Hmm, definitely a very deep thought

So, I love my new hair, it rocks and is the closest a gal like me can ever get to a stylish bob-type thing. However, am not sure about it with a centre parting. Side parting, I feel like a Hollywood starlet, back when that was a worthwhile thing to be. Centre parting and it turns into terrifying triangular hair, a curse for the curly. You straight-haired people will never know the true terror of triangular hair and what happens when that gets frizzy. Believe me when I say that I look almost indistinguishable from Crystal Tipps, a sad fate for anyone who isn't animated (as in drawn, rather than full of expression).

I Heart Books

I have just finished two books in two days and have started on a new one this morning. I go through periods of voraciously devouring books and due to the play finishing have got back into my stride a little. The first book was extremely enjoyable and quite long, so I was reading it throughout the run but, for obvious reasons, could never just sit down and plough through it. Ursula, Under by Ingrid Hill, a book which allows the reader a glimpse into the lineage of a small Finnish-Chinese-American girl who fell into a mineshaft and there bore the responsibility to live, being the last person in this epic line of people. I loved it, particularly the narrative, which was extremely omniscient and at several points made reference to a God who could see not only what was and what is but also what will be and what could have been, and by using this technique gave you insights into what could have been a better or worse life for the characters in question. Another thing I liked was that it was never sentimental and wouldn't linger on the potentially emotionally manipulative scenario of Ursula's predicament, focussing instead on differing viewpoints and practicality. I recommend everyone to read it.

The second book took me less than a day to read and was a horse of a totally different colour. A Year With The Producers by Jeffry Denman was an actor's diary taken from his auditions to his appearance as Matthew Broderick's understudy in the original Broadway production. I love reading about people who work in theatre, there's something about it that both undercuts and perpetuates the myth and glamour. You hear about the slog and the hell of auditioning but at the same time get to read about parties where Nathan Lane, Matthew Broderick, Mel Brooks and Anne Bancroft conga around a restaurant with the rest of the cast in tow. However, I was very glad I had seen both films, even if I'd never made it to see the production onstage (do you know how much those tickets cost? And it's currently John Gordon Sinclair who I am not that keen on) because it is written for an audience who know the show reasonably well. Someone coming into it completely cold would be rather confused by the references to Little Old Lady Land and chorus line swastikas.

So, I'm a big novels geek but at least MuleBoy would be proud of me for reading consistently adult books as he moans at me for reading children's books. He has yet to discover the genius of Philip Pullman and Garth Nix (seriously, if you haven't read Garth Nix yet, he is excellent. I wasn't a big fan of Sabriel but Lirael and Abhorsen are well worth it).

Rumours

I met up with my friends SpyGirl and Her Loveliness yesterday. SpyGirl is heading back to Italy tomorrow, which she says is due to her completing her studies in International Politics and that sort of malarkey but this must be a lie as WE ALL KNOW that she is really a spy doing spy things. I'm still rather confused as to why she's going back early as she was originally intending to meet up with a boy from her course (read: fellow spy) in Austria in order to have sex but has decided to change this to another time and the Lebanon (apparently Austria is boring so by going to the Lebanon she plans to combine sightseeing and sex).

However, this meant that this was my last opportunity to pump her for information about her Dad who, it is rumoured, writes romantic fiction under a female pseudonym. When told that he has been quizzed about this before and responded only with an enigmatic chuckle, SpyGirl decided that this meant he didn't but was trying to make himself look more interesting. However, she plans to investigate so we shall find out more in the future. I would love to know how the rumour started if it isn't actually true as it does imply a flight of fancy in the originator. SpyGirl then responded with a rumour about a mutual Mexican acquaintance who apparently left her job and disappeared back to Mexico in order to sort out her father's estate when he died and found herself the recipient, along with her siblings, of several million pounds that she had absolutely no idea her father owned. Apparently she is now staying in Mexico and living it up. Well, wouldn't you?

Bad Hair Day

I am getting my hair cut tomorrow, which isn't soon enough to my mind. For some reason, I decided to let it grow longer than I normally would and I am getting to the point where I remember why I cut it all off about 7 or 8 years ago. Dear Gods, let it just be shorter so that I may style my hair! I am also trying to decide in what way I would like to be pampered on Saturday and trying to find somewhere to get a moustache bleached. Any suggestions, please let me know, I am starting to get desperate. No-one has, of yet, mistaken me for a man but it's only a matter of time. I remember reading somewhere that in France they have a pet name for the feminine moustache but we seem to be terrified of hair in Britain. I found a stray white one on my jawline the other day and felt like an old crone. I seem to spend half my life shaving, waxing and plucking and would love someone to come up with a permanent hair-loss solution, wouldn't that be amazing! I have a list of ways to improve my appearance should I ever be visited by a genie and that's nearly top. At the top of the list is hair on my head that is obedient and that I can change the colour and style of at will. I'd have so much fun with that.

Hoorah for me

On a lighter note, it has been one month and counting since I last bought clothes. Yay me.

Well, I guess that's that, then

So we had our opening night of our show last night. It went well, generally pretty smooth, and the actors did well and got a good audience response. I think it'll be really excellent by Saturday as there's no rehearsal which works as well as just doing it in performance. I feel guilty for not having been very director-ly on Monday after the Dress Rehearsal and having done no St Crispin's Day type speech to really rally the troops. These three days have been so much harder than I thought they would be and at that point, I just wanted to clear up the problems and go to bed. MuleBoy is convinced that I will want to direct again in the future and at some point it'll suddenly click and I'll be desperate to direct again. So far, I'm just not there and I can't imagine ever being there. I have enjoyed the rehearsals, think the cast are amazing and am proud of the final product but I just don't feel the connection with directing that I probably should in order to want to do it again. I don't really like the responsibility and it doesn't give me the same thrill that I get from acting. So in future, I shall stick to the bit that I really love and leave directing to the people that crave it. Like the Mule

Poorly again

Again, apologies for neglecting to post. I'm generally just not in the mood when I'm at home and especially not when I am feverish and coughing up the contents of my lungs. Funny, that. Anyhoo, I am back at work and trying to work out what needs to be done and trying to get through several miles of paper. It's at times like these when you realise that there is stuff that just doesn't need to be done. I think filing is overrated for a start, we only seem to do it at all to cover our backs when we get audited. Or in order to be able to say "hah, we did send you that letter and we have the proof!" Basically, it's a general cover-all. I reckon that if the world was more trusting, we wouldn't need filing at all. Please everyone, let's make the world a more beautiful place. More trust, more trees!

I kept expecting MuleBoy to tell me I could have last week off from rehearsals as well but he wouldn't do it because he is a big meanie. I was living in fear that I'd pass germs on to the cast and tried to keep a distance. Easy in the theatre, tricky in the other tiny rehearsal spaces we have. I hid behind my scarf a lot of the time. As no-one has gone down with it yet, I am praying that this remains the case.

In all fairness, it is now Show Week, so I guess it was a bit short notice to let me off rehearsals (although surely a benefit of two directors). Yesterday was a long 12 hours comprising getting the set up, sorting the props, setting the lights, programming the lights, having a cue run-through and then a full run-through. Much to their credit, all concerned were tireless and uncomplaining and me and the Mule felt ourselves to be very lucky being surrounded by such a committed group of people. Hooray for you all and much thanks.

Strangely territorial

We had a meeting of our theatre group last night. The company chose a play that I can't act in for our July slot, so I am resigned to behind-the-scenes roles until December, when I shall be wowing the world with my playing of a one-scene-only Librarian. So much for that whole "no small parts" philosophy. Sorry Herself, but there was another play I really fancied doing so I am a bit disappointed. Good luck, though.

But this disappointment was overshadowed by the fact that in my place, the theatre where I spend a vast amount of my free time and have done since birth, there were suddenly interlopers. Now, I have grown accustomed to the fact that other people use it, it is public property after all. However, when these people comprise mainly of fellow members of staff from my work place, and ones that I am quite often not that keen on (I was at least able to point out to Big Sis both the man I regularly describe as Hagrid with BO and the-man-from-that-meeting-where-I-said-I-was-going-to-hit-him-with-a-chair-and-stab-him-with-my-pen) then I have good reason to feel discomfited by their sudden presence in my private life. I spoke to Hagrid on my way out and found out that they had been watching the play going on in the theatre, which sounded very worthy. I was quite shocked to find that the-man-from-that-meeting-etc had actually appeared in the show and found it almost impossible to imagine him doing anything other than be incredibly annoying and disgusting (I am still emotionally scarred from having to look through his office, the man himself is impeccable but the office... (shudder)). So not only are they trespassing upon my place, but also upon my activities. I probably shouldn't be this crazy about but I didn't like it. Part of it is that they are all very clever and have jobs that reflect this whereas I am not and do not. So I feel at a disadvantage to them at work and just enjoy having this bit of me that is special and talented that helps me know that I am as good as them and better in the thing that I do. So, basically, work and private life don't mix in my head very easily.

Fatal Addiction

I have failed. I bought some clothes yesterday. Although I can't feel too guilty as it was necessary clothes-buying and I'm not sure that socks and tights really count, especially when there's a 3 for 2 offer on at Boots. I shall rule that out and state that I am nearly up to a month of cold turkey. My last expenditure was a whole £10 on three items of clothing at H&M so I can start feeling smug soon, I think. I nearly caved last week as I looked really cute in a stripey t-shirt that only cost £6 but I figured that the whole feeble rationalisation thing is what normally gets me into trouble anyway. My aim is to avoid buying new clothes until it starts being hot again. I have already donated a great deal of last year's summer wardrobe to charity as I was swimming in some of it (in terms of size rather than actually went swimming in it), had managed to bleach a bit of it with this stupid cream I was trying and have just plain gone off the rest. I hate summer clothes so tend to get stuff that will last for a minimal period of time (the same length of time as the fabled British summer) but as I am going away to Italy for two weeks this August, I feel the need to get summer clothes that are both reasonably flattering and slightly durable. Thus, I am being frugal until a) I crack or b) it's May and starting to warm up. I would not put any money on b) if I were you.