Mo' Money

The heading is a reference to a film that I've never seen and which I remember primarily for the accompanying theme tune sung by Janet Jackson and Luther Vandross. In retrospect, it heralds the coming of the apocalypse starring, as it does, the Wayans Brothers. Admittedly the lead is Damon Wayans who is less evil than his brothers Shawn and Marlon who are responsible for Little Man (in cinemas now, run and hide), White Chicks and the Scary Movie franchise. These movies make these particular film makers (they write them too, dontcha know) as high up in my "I wish they didn't have a career" list as Michael Bay, Paul W S Anderson, Martin Lawrence and Renee Zellweger post-Nurse Betty. Damon, I can put up with for having starred in a Spike Lee film, albeit one that I didn't particularly like, and for not being involved in his brothers' output. Well played, Damon, well played.

That was a surprising detour considering that this was meant to be a post about the job that I applied for recently. I've been having that "stuck in a rut" feeling and have been applying for jobs that would be a big change, especially in the improving my finances department. This means that I have been applying for jobs quite a way above my experience level. However, I have had good feedback for my applications and managed to get an actual interview for one post. I got excited when I was shown what could be my office, which had but one workstation in it and a surprisingly pretty view but in the end this turned out to be more of an "and this is what you could have won" situation as I didn't get the job itself. Again, positive feedback but no actual job.

I had really mixed feelings about it, though. At one stage this weekend I considered the possibility that I may get offered the job and entertained the idea of turning it down and telling everyone that I just didn't get it. Obviously, that didn't happen because I wouldn't confess to it if I'd done it but the idea was there. I almost wished that I had done worse in interview so that there was no chance I'd get offered it. I fear change, basically. I would have said yes because I couldn't have turned down the money but I would have been shitting myself. It takes me a while to adjust to the idea of doing something new and even longer to convince myself that I can do something that I haven't already proved to myself I can do. My need for security, which I was explaining to Herself yesterday, extends to much more than my need to know where the money's coming from.

Likes and Dislikes

I've been catching up on book reading recently. I had a dry period before I went on holiday due to busy-ness and change of routine, especially walking to and from work which meant that I no longer had a good hour a day of platform and train-bound reading time. It took me a good two weeks to get through one book that would normally take me about four days. The last time I spent two weeks or more reading one book was Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell, a sizeable work of fiction that took me a mere three weeks (seriously, it's huge. I'm still proud of that record. It's also awesome, read it). Now I feel I am returning to form once again as I am able to utilise my spare time for reading once again. I have borrowed a couple of Ian Banks novels from my boss recently and am quite awed at his ability to not repeat himself in style or content. Go from reading The Wasp Factory to Whit or Espedair Street and see what I mean. You need a strong stomach for The Wasp Factory though, there's a particular scene in it that still makes me go pale at the thought. I don't think it would have had the same effect if I'd seen it on film, which is the reason I keep picking up Chuck Palahniuk's latest at the bookshop, before returning it to its pile in fear. There's a parental advisory label on it for goodness' sake.

Speaking of censorship, I am currently reading The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas whose blurb was so enigmatic that I had to get it. Although the story can be assumed from the blurb, the approach to it in the novel is different to any others that I've read on the subject and I approve of the mystery as more detailed descriptions would spoil the gradual revelations meted out to the reader through the lead character's innocence. The censorship that I object to is that implied in the blurb, which states "you will go on a journey with a nine-year old boy called Bruno. (Though this isn't a book for nine-year olds)." I actually think this is a book perfect for nine-year olds. They may not know about the subject, they may not realise the situation but they will understand the feelings of Bruno and perhaps want to learn more because of him and what he sees. Thanks to Mum and the boy in her class who urged her to read it.

So there we have it, I like reading. I like other people reading and then having conversations about books. I dislike watermelon. Although, bully to me, I ate some on holiday. It was mildly traumatic and I still don't like fruit.